Thursday, July 5, 2012

Loathing Las Vegas

I have spent the last week in Las Vegas for both business and pleasure.  I was originally going for a conference for work but was able to squeeze in a friend's 30th birthday celebration as well as have my parents join me for a trip to the Grand Canyon (more on that later).  This was my third trip to Vegas and having been disappointed in the past, I was hoping that this trip would help me figure out what all the fuss is about. 

Don't get me wrong, there are some really lovely things about Vegas, like the fact that for $100 a night you get an awesome hotel room with a separate living room and marble bath.  You can also buy absolutely anything you want there, the retail scene is incredible.  You never know who you might run into, I met Anthony Davis and chatted it up with him about his upcoming rookie NBA season.  I didn't mention my distaste for Coach Cal.  The food is amazing too, and the choices are limitless.  And, for the most part, the casinos/resorts really are beautiful.

But, there is always a line and procedure for everything.  You want to go to a club?  First during the day you have to meet up with one of their promoters, give them your number so that they can text you directions, then that night you go to the "podium" in the lobby and show them the text, and they give you a voucher.  You take the voucher to the entrance of the club so they can check you in, then you wait for someone to escort you up to the club.  Geeez.  It's like  being on a Carnival Cruise on land.  Everything is super expensive, the champagne may be free but the water is $9.  If your feet hurt from walking and you want to take a cab 1.5 miles to another hotel, it costs $25 because the traffic is so horrible.  It's 112 degrees outside and 54 degrees inside.  I think I had hypothermia a couple of times.  The streets are scary, but the worst part is the creeps that hand out cards with pictures of naked girls that simply have a phone number and price printed on them.  But, if you like people watching this just might be your place.  I got an eyeful of things I never wanted to see in my life.  I wonder if these people really act and dress like this in their normal life or if they feel like they get a pass because they are in Vegas?  Here is the best example of the fine clientele in Vegas:

This was at the Cosmopolitan Marquee Day Club pool, I am dead serious.

I think the very worst part was on the night of July 4 around 9:00 everyone crowded onto the strip expecting an awesome fireworks show.  I mean why wouldn't we, it's Vegas right?  We waited and waited and finally security guards came out and told us to move along, there would be no fireworks on that night.  What?  No fireworks on Independence Day?  Seriously?  We were told that they were going to wait until Saturday when more people would be there.  How un-American is that?  Big fat fail Vegas.

So, to sum it all up, this trip did nothing to improve my opinion of Sin City.  In fact, I think it might have made it worse.  I think some people are just Vegas people and others are not.  I am not, and I'm okay with that.

Fun fact of the day:  The Stratosphere Hotel and Tower, at more than 1,100 feet, is the tallest building west of the Mississippi and the fifth tallest building in the United States.


  1. I'm sorry but is that a pregnant girl in that picture???

  2. Haha!!! I love your fun facts!